Friday, February 6, 2009

The Mental Game

50% of the game is mental, the other half is mental. I drug Kay and the Nurse Practioner through the coals today, trying to get a handle on my sore throat, not being able to eat, and more. Bless the incredible NP, she met my volley with an amazing grace, calm and professionalism. It was a certifiable melt down. Thank you Brenda, you got the job done today. As is with most things you can't really explain, all of a sudden my world changed. It was like the turning over of a lake in spring, a ball reaching its apex and heading the other direction. All of a sudden, I owned my treatment.

Poor wife Kay has been walking through the world the last two weeks with a 190 lbs of dead weight wrapped around her ankle, holding on for dear life. I haven't driven a car or done much of anything, other than make demands on her. Which is OK, I know, but it had reached a breaking point. Not sure what broke, but I'm glad it did. I spent the morning and afternoon at the Cancer Center doing various things and when I got home I got in the car, went to the bank, did some paperwork there, ran an errand; a complete reversal of behavior. Tomorrow Kay is going up to KU for some Sam fraternity things, watch the Hawks play, and have a time that's not about cancer.

Imagine all of this, then put in a backdrop of your mom passing away slowly but surely. OK, I admit it, I married over my head.


  1. Jayme,
    Welcome back to the lighted side of the moon. Keep taking good care of Kay so she can take good care of you.

  2. I know the feeling, I also married up when I married Ann. I am tickled to hear from you, you sound in good spirits and having extra energy is a bonus. As you know most of the personal growth we do happens while we are kicking and screaming saying no, no until we go over the ridge and see this incredible vast landscape that can not be expressed in words and we wonder what took us so long to get here. I Love you and the journey that you are on. #6

  3. Kay & Jayme,

    Jayme, you don't know me at all-but I know Kay from here at the office. And, I'm one of those people who has a terrible time coming up with the right words. Anyway, right now I think the only "right" words are to tell you that there are people you don't even know who are praying for you and will continue to pray for you through this process. You can never have too many people praying for you-that much I do know!

    Continue with your blog updates & I will keep everyone here at the office "in the know" when they ask me how you're both doing-and they do ask-alot! Keep the faith & stay strong! And we'll keep holding you up in our thoughts and prayers!